Something Worth Fighting For

I love when people ask (and sometimes even just assume) how we chose Haiti. Most people think that we were working with the Colorado Haiti Project and that our volunteer time stirred up a desire to adopt from Haiti. But the reality is that we chose Haiti, pretty much out of a hat. Okay, it was a bit more logical than that, but you know what I mean. Here’s what happened:

Drew and I have always had a heart for adoption, particularly because my older (and only) brother, Sean was adopted. Not only was my brother adopted, but he happened to be college roommates and best friends with the guy that would one day -now- be my (most amazing) husband! It’s such a beautiful story…one that God had up His sleeve all along. All the years of waiting and wondering that my parents endured. The questions I had about when my prince charming would arrive. It all falls together beautifully in this gloriously ordained puzzle that is ever-growing. It seems like it should be the end of an amazing love story, but it continues. There is more love and much more story.

When we knew for sure that International adoption was right for us, we looked at our adoption agency’s list of countries, without a single personal connection to any, and chose Haiti. Proximity, age, timeline, travel requirements…they all lined up with what we were hoping for. And that was it! Done. Haiti. “We’re adopting from Haiti”. Our eyes, hearts and souls lit up when we said those four words. And in that moment, God planted little Haiti-shaped seeds in our hearts. He has faithfully watered them, fed them and grown them tremendously over the past 2-ish years. And with those seeds came a desire to learn more about our children’s country, culture and history and a passion for the people of Haiti; the family of our kids—our family.

We sought out the Colorado Haiti Project in December of 2015 and after several emails and phone calls, we had a face to face and shared our hearts. Shortly thereafter I was meeting interns, staff and volunteers and exactly one year ago today, I helped with my first ever CHP event, their 2nd Annual Farm Dinner. I even met an amazing Haitian young woman named Christelle throughout the planning phases of the event. And because of our awesome friends and family (aka: our village), we continue to meet people with connections to Haiti, from Haiti, who had adopted from Haiti, visited Haiti, lived in Haiti….the list goes on and on.

Our passion for Haiti hit an all-time high (thus far) on our recent visit to Petit Trou de Nippes, Haiti this past April. We met amazing people. We laughed together, ate together, learned together and made lasting memories.

So why am I telling you all of this? Well, it’s because I’m asking you to reflect. Maybe you’re reflecting as a fellow adoptive-parent from Haiti (or somewhere else). Maybe you are my family or a dear friend that will one day know and love my Haitian children. Maybe you work in Haiti or maybe you know nothing about Haiti except what you hear in the media. Whatever the case…will you take a moment to reflect with me…?

One thing that Drew and I realized after our trip in April was that there was SO much more we could do than adoption. Now, pause: adoption is beautiful and it is challenging and it takes the right open heart and open, patient mind. I’m not downplaying adoption at all here, so please know that! What Drew and I became so much more aware of is that there are millions of children in Haiti (and the world) with hopes and dreams for their futures. Dreams that may soon be snuffed out by reality if we don’t do something. We have this amazing organization right at our fingertips. They have been working in the same area of Haiti for 26 years, folks. That’s commitment. And here’s the thing…they’re still learning and growing together. They have established an important trust that is hard to find and that trust has led to partnership and friendship. I have friends in Haiti, my friends. And you should meet them. They’re the best!

Okay, so now the reflection part. (I never said I’d be quick!)

I hear, so often, some (what could be taken as) negative or snarky comments about Haiti, particularly when it comes to adoption. I am guilty myself, even, but I often wonder how those comments can be harmful, particularly to my future children. Phrases like “Haiti just does their own thing” or “We all know Haiti ___ (fill in the blank)”. But what I have been thinking about and want to share with you is this: Do we really know Haiti? Think about what that means. Do we know their fight for independence? Do we know the pride in freedom that they rightfully possess and cherish? Do we know the struggle and despair that many face daily? What it means to be without food or a job or a house or a family? The list goes on and on, dear friends. And what I’ve come to realize is that we don’t know Haiti at all. Our country has painted its own picture of Haiti that, in my opinion, is very inaccurate.

In the adoption world, it seems that we often think Haiti is the only culprit in the pain-stakingly long process, but our State Department is an equal contributor. Yes, Haiti does things their own way in their own time, but I guess what I’m reflecting on is, what makes our ways and times superior? When did we become the ultimate? I often envy the beautiful culture I had the privilege of experiencing in rural Haiti. My loving, hospitable and generous friends with hearts of gold and determination beyond measure. Their hope far exceeds any I have seen and they dare to dream of all that is possible. Perseverance. Passion. Drive. All wrapped up in this beautiful culture. But there are limited resources available and a history of oppression and corruption (let’s not start on America’s role in this) that they are still fighting. If you ask me, what they need is not for people to fight for them, but rather to fight alongside them. Get to know them. Respect them for their ways and their differences. Earn their trust, just as the Colorado Haiti Project has, and stand with them in partnership and hope.

When we returned to Colorado in April, the first thing Drew and I began reflecting on is “what else can we do?” How do we fight (harder) alongside our friends? How do we keep kids out of orphanages by keeping families together? Create jobs? Build infrastructure? There is so much…where to start?

Lucky for us, we get to work with the Colorado Haiti Project to accomplish this and so much more. We’re seeing families growing home gardens, receiving agriculture education, animal husbandry training and entrepreneurship training. Scholarship students are returning to the community to teach at St. Paul’s…the very school they grew up in. Water-borne illness is far less common because of 12 safe-water wells and Community Health Aides are working in their villages to keep their neighbors safe and healthy.

But, more than anything, I get to teach my kids about the hard work, pride and perseverance of their homeland. They will one day meet our friends in Haiti and know that their blan parents possess a love for Haiti that extends far beyond the act of adoption. It’s not just something I want to talk about and read about in books. I want them to see it with their own eyes and feel it with their own handshakes and high-fives. I want them to know that their biological family is our family, too. That it doesn’t stop at the signing of papers and court officials legally declaring us parents. We feel a strong responsibility to our children, our friends in Haiti, their children, and all the generations to come to do everything in our power to walk with them. Fight with them.

Today marks the 101st anniversary of the U.S. invading Haiti and 330 Marines occupying Port au Prince. Nothing I know compares to that difficult time in history for Haiti. But I do know that Haiti has changed my heart and the way I think about so many things. They have made my heart bigger and much more full. I challenge you to open your heart up to something new and unexpected today. Maybe that’s Haiti. And maybe you can be a catalyst for change with Drew and I at the Colorado Haiti Project.


Maybe it’s another cause that’s near and dear to your heart. The options are endless. But whatever it is, challenge yourself, your kids, family and friends to think differently. Fight for something today and every day; but not on your own terms. In partnership and trust—together. As ONE.




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